Is your husband king of the castle? Today something came across my desk that I want to talk about. We women have a problem sometimes. Unfortunately we do not always realize it either.
Your husband is a provider. He needs to feel like a provider. Many times we women, unknowingly, make him feel like less of a man. Maybe he is struggling to make ends meet and they are not meeting. Maybe he has health problems and can’t work, or laid off or fired. How do we treat him consciously as well as unconsciously?
My husband is a hard worker. He is thoughtful, does his best and goes the extra mile. He works long hours, comes home tired and often there is much to do around here and he is tired. The temptation is to not want to let him sit down, but cut the grass, fix this or that etc.
Our ends also do not meet. Sometimes we get behind. Sometimes we do without things we should not do with out. We also do without needs.
Life is a struggle and with all the prices going up, gas getting out of the world and our health insurance making another big jump it is going to make things even harder.
How about you?
Now, how do we make our husbands feel? Many of us are stay at home moms and care for our children. I, personally, think this is the highest calling any woman can have and am all for it. Many find things to do at home for extra money as well as the ability to make the money we do have go farther. I babysit and clean offices one night a week and on weekends to help. But, how do we deal with our husbands when things are tight? Or when things need to be done at home?
I hear more and more women complain. Complain to their husbands, to others and in general about not making ends meet, about him not fixing stuff etc. Men have needs emotionally. They need to feel they are providing and appreciated even if ends aren’t meeting. They need to know you appreciate and respect them for their hard work, inability to work or trying to get a job.
How do you talk to him? Is it negative or positive (or positively negative)? Our words and actions communicate so much to him. If he knows that his efforts are appreciated and you are fully supporting him emotionally and physically then he can feel like King of His Castle.
I have learned that I need to give my husband the pleasure of resting when he gets home, even if there are things to be done. If I offer him the drink, be positive and give him time to rest, then tell him kindly that something needs to be fixed etc it works much better.
If I am positive and making sure he knows how much his efforts mean and how much I know he is trying things work much better.
I am not saying manipulate, I am saying doing it in love and care for him and his needs. Let him be king and he will make you queen. My husband responds to the positive. We may not be meeting the ends or just meeting them, but there is peace and happiness in our home because this works for me and will work for you also.