Since we are contracted for cleaning at 17 offices in a plant, we had to find someone to cover us and pay them, $900 for during vacation and another week because we had conflicts. Rick’s family has a small house the rent out and the man ran into some problems and could not pay any rent one month and part of the rent another. The rent pays the taxes, so we had to come up with the money ($260) out of our pocket. My husband needed to pay for a course he is taking, $200. Today the renters money is due again and I know we can’t cover it this time. Worry!
As I lay there I was getting more and more frightened until God started to speak. See, I was also worrying because I was worrying and did not like the lack of peace I was having. It has not been part of me in so long it was odd to me and hurt. When God spoke He asked me about my lack of time with Him lately. I used to read and pray every morning, I had been slipping. This was the key!
I had been getting up, running to my computer, and fitting me Bible reading and prayer in when and if I could.
I got out of bed and had my time with Him and peace came. I still have no idea how all will be cared for, but I have peace.
I began to wonder about when my kids were small and I was young, how much better I would have been if I spent my time with God more regularly. Raising five kids was tough. Someone was always into something, hurting something and getting yelled at (and one place we lived it was unjustly by a neighbor, so this meant also having patience with dealing with an unsaved neighbor). I was also a pastor’s wife so everyone thought they knew how you were to dress, your kids act etc.
I spent time with the Lord, but at my convenience, or when I was worried, upset or angry with someone (which was most of the time), but many of my prayers were not trusting and in faith, but prayers that the other person would change etc. We had so many financial troubles, those alone were more than enough worry on it’s own. Instead of trusting I worried and often told God how to answer me. (You know the ones “have some one give us money” or ” “somehow get that guy for what he is doing” etc.)
Are you having problems with worry over daily family living? Worried about your kids and how they will turn out? A sickness in the family? Unemployment? Read your Bible and pray. God provided for me when I put my dependency totally on Him. I finally did this about 4 years ago, I let things to him and he filled me with peace as long as I gave it all to Him.
Your kids are God’s. He loves them more than you. He will care for them and give you the wisdom needed, but it takes praying and reading and praying.
If you are like me, have my weakness of worry it is no good for you or your family. If I can overcome, anyone can. It takes persistence and not give up when you fail. You will be a much better wife and mother when you leave it all to Him!