“What is a godly grandmother? For example: my own mom got a college degree after her kids were grown and is now a teacher at a Christian school. She rarely has time for us. On the other hand my aunt practically raises her grand kids, drives them to school, cleans her daughter’s house while her daughter is at work, and takes all the kids to their various activities. She even takes them a lot on weekends too. What is the biblical model of a Grandma? Should my mom be staying at home (the best place for a woman, in my opinion, wherever possible) and try to help more in mentoring me and being a godly influence to her grandchildren? Or is it right that I do it on my own with no help? I realize my aunt’s method is unhealthy and don’t want that either!”
Today’s world has made life a dilemma. The world says go get what you can and be all you can be (in the world) and has become very self centered. When we look back on the way things were, women stayed home, took care of family, each generation training the next one down. Men did the same with the boys, turning them into men. Now, families are split, boys have no father roll models and girls have a mom that is away and letting someone else watch them. However, what about when a woman has raised her children, is her roll done? Can she now do whatever she wants because the children are not there and she is free? What does the Bible say?
Again I go to Titus 3:5:
“Let the older women teach the younger women to love their husbands, love their children, be sensible, pure, workers at home, kind, being subject to their own husbands, that the word of God may not be dishonored”
What does the Bible say about a grandmother? I find one reference and that is in 2 Timothy 1:5
“For I am mindful of the sincere faith within you, which first dwelt in your grandmother Lois and your mother Eunice, and I am sure that it is in you as well.”
Here Paul is talking about Timothy’s grandmother and the her faith being taught to Timothy. Apparently she was a real woman of God who had a lot of contact with her grandson and taught him the ways of God.
A Biblical woman follows what God has set for her. Scripture clearly says the older is to teach the younger, go back and read Titus 3:5 again. How do the younger learn? How does anyone learn? We learn by seeing it in practice as well as being told.
I take my position of wife and mother to be the highest calling I, as a woman, can have. I believe each has a commitment, responsibility and debt to the next generation. We have failed greatly in this over the last few generations. People have become more independent, more self-centered and as a result there is the mess there is today with families.
Now, back to the full question asked me. I am glad you see that what your aunt is doing is wrong. It is not teaching, it is doing and controlling. It is letting a mom get out of her responsibilities to her family. What your mom is doing I will not say is wrong, but there needs to be a balance. There should be teaching and helping.
All this said, I know there are times when a mom has to work, death, divorce and such leave a family needing the mom out there. This should be when the family steps in and cares for the children so they do not need to go to day care. If this is possible.
I do not live near most of my kids, but when I was there I kept them and tried to teach and help. Now, I babysit a precious granddaughter for her mom and we work together for her good. I have a good relationship with my step daughter and she looks to me for help and teaching, both of her and her baby.
The world has come into the family and is dividing it up, confusing the roles of parents and grandparents , making God’s ways appear old fashioned or out dated. His ways are not, and I would love to see us move back to what He says.
If we read Proverbs 31 and see what a godly woman is (mother, grandmother, single) we see she works from home, puts family first and is someone that can be looked up to. Moms and grand moms we need to become what God has set out for us. For our children and grandchildren to be whole this is needed.