The Proverbs Woman

The Perfect Wife and Mother from Proverbs 31:10 to 31:

10An excellent wife, who can find?
For her worth is far above jewels.
11The heart of her husband trusts in her,
And he will have no lack of gain.
12She does him good and not evil
All the days of her life.
13She looks for wool and flax
And works with her hands in delight.
14She is like merchant ships;
She brings her food from afar.
15She rises also while it is still night
And gives food to her household
And portions to her maidens.
16She considers a field and buys it;
From her earnings she plants a vineyard.
17She girds herself with strength
And makes her arms strong.
18She senses that her gain is good;
Her lamp does not go out at night.
19She stretches out her hands to the distaff,
And her hands grasp the spindle.
20She extends her hand to the poor,
And she stretches out her hands to the needy.
21She is not afraid of the snow for her household,
For all her household are clothed with scarlet.
22She makes coverings for herself;
Her clothing is fine linen and )purple.
23Her husband is known in the gates,
When he sits among the elders of the land.
24She makes linen garments and sells them,
And supplies belts to the tradesmen.
25Strength and dignity are her clothing,
And she smiles at the future.
26She opens her mouth in wisdom,
And the teaching of kindness is on her tongue.
27She looks well to the ways of her household,
And does not eat the bread of idleness.
28Her children rise up and bless her;
Her husband also, and he praises her, saying:
29“Many daughters have done nobly,
But you excel them all.”
30Charm is deceitful and beauty is vain,
But a woman who fears the LORD, she shall be praised.
31Give her the product of her hands,
And let her works praise her in the gates.

Do you notice anything? I do. I am not her.  When I work on sewing, my house falls apart. A 2 year old makes sure of it, as do the dishes from the last meal (or 2 or 3).

I can’t get my money to stretch to buy supplies.

My creativity gets lost somewhere at times.

When things get to me I want to just sit. I am tired. My brain gets fried. I get to missing my family that is not in Texas.

More creativity leaves.

I am a naturally creative person. I have made things work by using what I have. Sometimes I fill this way more than others. Right now, I feel like a failure.

Do you notice that it says in verse 30 that a woman who fears the Lord shall be praised? It is the most important thing. Even through the slow times, the trying times, the stress times, if we fear the Lord we will come through it.

Stress! Yes, that is it. Stress hinders creativity. Stress tires. Stress short circuits the brain. When stress is allowed it smothers out trusting and fearing the Lord.

Maybe my husband’s hours at work have been cut. Maybe vacation to see my family is not looking possible. Maybe things at the house are falling apart. Maybe the sewing is not getting done or the business not going anywhere right now. Maybe ….  BUT am I trusting the Lord? Is my faith and fear in Him? My dependency for all of this?  How about my creativity itself? Maybe a test? Am I failing?

We women think we are super women, and when we read Proverbs we think we should be. However, read that verse 30 again… and again. It is by fearing the Lord that we can be that super woman. It is HIm in us. It is His guidence, doing things His way and trusting. We get burned out on our own.

Read Proverbs. Start with the beginning and read a chapter or less a day. You will find so much for us women. Do we build our home or tear it down? How does God expect us to be in the home?  Are we a dripping faucet? A control freak? A boss? hmmmmmmmmmm ?  If so, we are not fearing the Lord.

Where is your beauty?

Today I was reading some in the Proverbs. I find so much for life in there and every so often take a month and just read a Proverb a day. There are reminders, promises, admonitions as well as life lessons and humor.

While reading today I came across this verse:

As a gold ring in a swine’s snout, so is a beautiful woman who lacks discretion. Proverbs 11:22

Now, imagine a gold ring in a pigs nose. Think about it. A wallowing in the mud, snorting pig. Does it make that mud caked smelly pig look any better? Does it hide all the dirt?

Now, think of a beautiful woman. We all know many of them, or have known of them. How many of them are so beautiful outside, but what are they inside?

Many of us grew up trying to make the outside better and found we could only go so far. The world has made us feel like we are lesser, unwanted, lower than the pretty ones out there. So many of us believed what was said, believed we were inferior and even as adults and out of that teen age we still have that stuck in our heads somewhere.

While it is not wrong to work on looking out best, we need to worry more about our inside beauty. I have met some very beautiful woman who were the nastiest  people inside. I have met some very beautiful woman who used that beauty to lure men into wrong relationships.

Are you working on your discretion?  Do you know right from wrong? How to manage your home? How to bite your tongue? Use your words wisely? Love your husband? Your children? What kind of mommy do you become when your kids disobey? Or what kind of wife when you and your hubby disagree?  Are you controlling or can you compromise, work thing out and keep calm?

Let’s work on our inner beauty and discretion. Do what we can, within reason, on the outside, but make that inside  beautiful. Proverbs 31:30 says

Charm is deceitful and beauty is vain, But a woman who fears the Lord, she shall be praised.

Do we want the praise of our Lord as well as our husband and children or the oogling of the men out there and the jealousy of other women?

King of the Castle

Is your husband king of the castle? Today something came across my desk that I want to talk about. We women have a problem sometimes. Unfortunately we do not always realize it either.

Your husband is a provider. He needs to feel like a provider. Many times we women, unknowingly, make him feel like less of a man. Maybe he is struggling to make ends meet and they are not meeting.  Maybe he has health problems and can’t work, or laid off or fired. How do we treat him consciously as well as unconsciously?

My husband is a hard worker. He is thoughtful, does his best and goes the extra mile. He works long hours, comes home tired and often there is much to do around here and he is tired. The temptation is to not want to let him sit down, but cut the grass, fix this or that etc.

Our ends also do not meet. Sometimes we get behind. Sometimes we do without things we should not do with out. We also do without needs.

Life is a struggle and with all the prices going up, gas getting out of the world and our health insurance making another big jump it is going to make things even harder.

How about you?

Now, how do we make our husbands feel? Many of us are stay at home moms and care for our children. I, personally, think this is the highest calling any woman can have and am all for it. Many find things to do at home for extra money as well as the ability to make the money we do have go farther. I babysit and clean offices one night a week and on weekends to help. But, how do we deal with our husbands when things are tight? Or when things need to be done at home?

I hear more and more women complain. Complain to their husbands, to others and in general about not making ends meet, about him not fixing stuff etc. Men have needs emotionally. They need to feel they are providing and appreciated even if ends aren’t meeting. They need to know you appreciate and respect them for their hard work, inability to work or trying to get a job.

How do you talk to him? Is it negative or positive (or positively negative)? Our words and actions communicate so much to him. If he knows that his efforts are appreciated and you are fully supporting him emotionally and physically then he can feel like King of His Castle.

I have learned that I need to give my husband the pleasure of resting when he gets home, even if there are things to be done. If I offer him the drink, be positive and give him time to rest, then tell him kindly that something needs to be fixed etc it works much better.

If I am positive and making sure he knows how much his efforts mean and how much I know he is trying things work much better.

I am not saying manipulate, I am saying doing it in love and care for him and his needs. Let him be king and he will make you queen. My husband responds to the positive. We may not be meeting the ends or just meeting them, but there is peace and happiness in our home because this works for me and will work for you also.

Christian Homemaking Site and Forum

Today is Works For Me Wednesday at Rocks in My Dryer and I would like to tell you about something that Works for Me.

I find that trying to live the Christian woman life often needs support. I want to be here for those that need the support and advice of someone who is older and has been there. I have also found other places on the web that are there to help. One of them is a forum as well as web site called Christian Homemaking. I find there are good helps as well as support to help us be all we can be as women. Check out the site! Martha has a real heart for women and is developing quite a lot of helps on the site as well as the forum.

My name is Peggie, and I am older

Growing older has been tough for me. I have never wanted to tell my age, avoid it at all costs. It is like my weight, who wants to tell people they weigh more than they should? I don’t! Nor do I want to tell people I am getting older.

Funny huh? We are all getting older, but I try to hide it. I get along great with people much younger than me and most people think I am in their age range. Most of the time I get away with it. Today at church I was point blank asked my age. I was horrified! I stumbled around, tried to avoid it by being funny (at least trying) and they would not let me, they had the nerve to push the issue. How dare they!

Finally I said it, I am 59. It sounded so old! Then they would not believe me. I told them I for sure was and they were sure I was not and was just telling them that since they pushed. I convinced them when I finally said “If I was going to lie about it I would go the other way”.

Well, my name is Peggie and I am 59. There it is out for the whole world to see.

However, I realized that being 59 qualifies me to be the older woman that is to teach the younger women. It is a command. It is also something that has been on my heart, but for so long I have not been able to admit I am older.

I hope to be able to write on topics that have to do with the verse Titus 3:5, the things older women are to teach younger women. I will have my email address on the sidebar and well as an IM for you to talk to me when I am online. Please feel free to ask questions and I will do my best to answer both personally and in the blog.

I hope we can grow together, to be the woman of God we are meant to be.